The Real Reel

I’ve contemplated what I wanted my second blog post to be on since the minute I uploaded my first post. I wrote a few drafts but nixed them. I even drafted one post that I sent to my sister to look over as a final step before publishing, but pulled it at the last second. None of the drafts felt right. Until it struck me…

I was so focused on how people would perceive my thoughts and writing that it prevented me from doing what I created this space for. I sat in front of my computer, thinking over my recent experiences, and I realized that the very thing I strive for in life, was precisely the thing that was missing from my drafts: authenticity.

Authenticity is what makes or breaks a relationship for me. It’s the stuff I build my relationships on. Whether it’s my family, a friend, or even a coworker, I find myself naturally gravitating towards those who can keep it real with me. I’m sure many of you can relate. Ultimately, it’s in those harmonious relationships that I find myself the happiest.  

But, if authenticity is the end goal or an ideal that I pursue, then where do I begin? As cliché as it may sound, I realize that the answer is within myself.

Pretty cheesy, I know. But I make this a point because I find that, at times, I need to check in with myself. And, as a millennial, what better way to get a glimpse of own my life than to scroll through my social media accounts?

Well, yes and no.

Social media can be a tricky, little thing. On one hand, I feel like it allows me to share a part of me with others. On the other hand, this also means that I can filter out parts of my life, posting only the highlights and angles that I so choose. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, per se. It only starts becoming a problem when I let that platform shape my entire image or consume me. If highlights are the only thing that I focus on in my life, then it becomes easy to disregard the lows, sacrifices, lessons, and most importantly, the relationships that withstood the hardships along the way. It’s much healthier to embrace the entire process that leads up to that perfectly captured moment that the viewers get to see.

That doesn’t mean I’m going to grab my camera every time I’m feeling sad so that I can selfie my low points. What it does mean is that I want to be more mindful of how I use this tool called social media. I don’t want to get too caught up on the presentation of my social media accounts because it’s only one of the many ways I can share my life with others and feel connected.

I want to remind myself that just as I have many more layers than what ends up on screenshots, so do the others that I follow on social media. This is such an important concept to not lose sight of because we live in a world where we’re bombarded with endless, visual stimulation of other people’s highlight reels. It’s toxic to live a life of constant comparison – especially when it’s apples to oranges – the nitty gritty of our real lives, flaws and all, with the carefully curated gallery of picture-perfect moments.

While it may be impossible to show a completely holistic representation of who I am through social media, the most important thing at the end of the day is that I am true to myself, whatever platform I find myself on.

If I remain truly authentic to myself, I feel like I can take on whatever life throws my way. Given, I’m not a robot, so I’m sure I’ll have my moments of struggling to find acceptance and my fair share of doubts and insecurities. Still, I hope that I can get a little better at distinguishing my own thoughts from outside noise. I want to be real with myself and real with others.

So, life update: in this very moment, I’m at a crossroad and I don’t know what’s around the next corner. I recently quit my job, moved across the country in my car to start this new chapter in my life, and am literally taking it a day at time. But all in all, I feel like my head is in the right place.

I hope that I was able to give you all some food for thought. If nothing else, I hope I was able to at least reassure all my loved ones that I am doing okay!

Until next time,

stay melovated.